April 29, 2011

"Yes we still have racism today, I mean we have Fox News."

April 28, 2011

Teacher: "Why are you eating sugar out of a sugar packet right now during class?"
Student: "It was in my coat pocket and I wanted to eat it."

April 27, 2011

Teacher: "The governor of Colorado in the mid 1920s was a member of the KKK."
Student: "That doesn't surprise me at all, most of Eastern Colorado is full of a bunch of tea partyers."

Teacher: "The governor of Colorado in the mid 1920s was a member of the KKK."
Student: "Screw him."

April 26, 2011

"The highlight of my day? I ate a peep for the first time in my life."

April 25, 2011

"Today is the worst day ever. We had to watch a woman give birth on a video in health class."

April 22, 2011

"I don't think I can run any more, I might throw up, I ate Mexican food last night at Casa Bonita, the place with the cliff divers."

April 21, 2011

Student: "Today is Thursday right?"
Teacher: "Yes"
Student: "So, it's Thursday, right?"
Teacher: "Yes, are you just confirming the day of the week?"
Student: "Yes, I just wanted to make sure today was Thursday."

April 20, 2011

"Are you wearing a Civil War uniform because today is 4/20?"

April 19, 2011

Student: "Today is probably the first time I have studied for anything this year."
Teacher: "What was the occasion?"
Student: "I was really bored."

April 18, 2011

"My pencil is not sharp enough for my standards, can I go try and find an electric pencil sharpener?"

April 15, 2011

Teacher: "What's up?"
Student: "Awesome"

"I can feel my heartbeat in my neck/shoulder area, is that bad?"

April 14, 2011

"It's just your basic love letter."

April 13, 2011

"My girlfriend dumped me, I will probably never have another girlfriend again. I will probably die alone, and I suck at running the mile."

April 12, 2011

"So you are saying that you will give us an additional assignment if we are walking around the library saying that we are bored, what if the assignment that you give us is so dreadfully boring that we get more bored?"

April 11, 2011

"You could help me milk the goats."

April 8, 2011

Student: "Could I staple you?"
Teacher: "No"
Student: "Fine, I will staple myself."

April 7, 2011

"This project is harder than you think, especially if you are me and have a reputation to uphold."

April 6, 2011

"You know I have a disability right?"

"I burned my foot really really bad when I stepped on my hair straightener this morning."

April 5, 2011

"A certain teacher failed to yield to me while I was riding my ride across the street this morning. Should I press charges?"

April 4, 2011

"It's going to be so fun, we are going to run there, get all full, and then run back and throw up."

April 1, 2011

Teacher: "Question number 41 on the climate survey: would you invite someone sitting alone to join you and your friends?"
Student: "Could you give me a brief description of what this person looks like?"